Hysteria - Blinded By Religious Doctrines

These two decades of silence have been long
But I know that this past atmosphere of terror
Still haunts everyone's spirit

I was able to live on in my
Memories during all this time
I'm conscious that iI have spread evil on my way
I'm forever haunted and gnawed by evil

Do you want to know the secret of pain?
It's when you cannot feel it
Anymore that you can use it!!!
No remorse, no compassion
A perfect determination:
These are the secrets
Of my perverted perseverance
Coming from my sadistic sexual fantasy

I track, I dominate, I control
I master my art like nobody
They suffer, they endure, they suffocate
They implore my forgiveness
I torture, I martyrize, I extend the pleasure
They come to mind
They are subjected to my torments
They cry, they implore: The end is near
I kill, I masturbate, I come
I contemplate my works: I'm proud!!!

I'm proud to have reached such perfection
The excellence of this scene in front of me
Is the refection of my existential pain
The mirror of my perfidious being
The hidden face of my deranged spirit

Yet, I'm part of your fellow creatures
Respected by everyone
Thanks to the Christ Lutherian Church
God has come to help me
God is my savior
I have found peace of mind
In faith and decadence

I have prayed, I have confessed
And preached your word all this time
I have believed in you without having a sign
I have left everything
To devote myself heart and soul for your work

I have heard such vile and ignoble things
That a man could accept and support
I have excused so many butchers in your name
Believing that you will
Be the savior of this world in perdition

Blinded by your sermons
I have lied in your name
I have seen so many men kneel
To pray before your effigy
And after having been a witness
Of so many torments without a response
I have lost my faith
Yes, I have lost my faith!!!
Replaced by the hatred
That I have now for you and your followers
Like me they have been weak
Vulnerable and easily influenced

Now I'm resolved not to believe in all these lies
Which have ruined my existence
I have faith in no one but myself
My vison: religion is a refuge for the weak
An illusion whose goal is to save human beings
Form their existential torments
Man is weak, he needs a cure to face the reality
Religion is a venom, a destructive poison

Tu n'es pas le Messie
Tu n'es pas un martyr
Tu es juste le néant

Ils croient en toi
Ils prient pour toi
Ils sont aveuglés par toi

Je crois en moi
Mon âme m'appartient
rien ne pourra me changer...

And if for all this time
The truth has been hidden from us?
And if the origin of all religions
Were not what we thought?
And if the writings were just pure myths?

The first church born from the ashes of chaos
Was founded in the glory of a God
Who was hunted away after the war of the heavens
At the antipodes of the churches
Built of long time before
Not far from the Vatican...

Buried in order to never discover its existence
Place of meditation and satanic cults
Created in contradiction with all
Contemporary religious values
A church glorifying the meanders
A church glorifying the profanation of Christ
In the name of Lucifer: the fallen angel

Why had it been hidden for centuries?
Perhaps because it was immoral?
Perhaps it could put into doubt religious beliefs?
Thus causing the decline of christianism
And other established religions?
Or incrimination again the Vatican?
Wanting to impose its religious supremacy
In erasing all traces of its existence

And if history were false...

Ravaged by my souvenirs
I'm still haunted by a deep
And unhealthy desire
Gnawing me from inside
Pursued by the human being
Which sleeps inside me
Nothing can stop my dementia

My real personality is substituted
For this diabolical entity
A gloomy character filled with hate
Excelling in the art of cruelty
I come to question myself
If I don't become mad
In personalizing the many-faces of my spirit?
Or just simply have I always been this horrid monster
Who can commit the worst infamies?

I cannot stay like this
I must attack again
Moments of lucidity become rare
I'm totally submerged in this world of horridness
A universe which is unreal for the moment
And which can just be materialized
By the bestiality of my acts

Phantasms are not enough for me
The taste, the smell, the flavour, the heat
Of flesh and blood are so faraway
Buried deep down in my spirit
Memory and souvenirs are nothing
Compared to the ecstasy
Which only the act of killing can bring me

My quest: come tot he end of my works
Which for the moment is uncompleted
I shall never be the same
I am a victim of a metamorphosis
The blood which runs through
My body is not the same
It's not mine anymore, it is inhuman
Lonely, I'm immortal...

Having been a witness of suffering through disease
I cannot help thinking that
Euthanasia would have certainly brought relief
With days passing by
Pain growing, the body deteriorating
All this has made me realize
That only the end could be a real salvation

Agony is endless, crying insufferable
Pangs of suffering never-ending
The fight is vain, it's useless to hope
Each past victory just pushes off the end
Which comes earlier than foreseen
And often strikes when we don't expect it

Facing this event, just one thing comes to mind:
A short death!
That it finishes as quickly as possible
It's unworthy to have such thoughts
But the outcome cuts short the suffering
Which gnaws this lifeless body

We want to have a good conscience
In saying that drugs annihilate suffering:
But it's wrong!
The body endures and suffers
Until the last moment
Until the glimmer of life
Fighting continually without hope for a cure
Each battle won against disease
Is just another remission
The issue of the fight is known
Only one winner: death!!!

I don't want to end up like this
I don't want them to be witnesses of my decay
I don't want them to see my
Corporal degradation, my lost spirit
That's why I hope that
I will have the necessary courage...

There is no place for the weak
That's the lesson I get out of my short life
During the years time passes
Without unfortunately erasing
The ravages of the past
Which stay forever engraved in my memory

That's why I have decided to go forward
And not to trouble about torments
Which have shattered my existence
I don't care about my suffering
Other people's affect me more

When I contemplate people near me
I cannot help thinking
That one day I will see them dying
That's how life goes
And it doesn't leave me indifferent
But I do what is necessary to prepare myself
And to come out stronger than before

Sometimes we think
We can control our emotions
We don't want to see reality
But freeing the pain which is in us
Allows us to go on to something else
Keeping this sorow inside us
And fighting against it is even worse
It's just putting off the reckoning day
And making the fall more tragic

In spite of all this
You mustn't regret anything
And must remenber
The most important moments
Unfortunetaly nothing
Can ersase mistakes of the past
Life is just a sequence of ordeals
Which we are all confronted with
And which make us greater each time
Never give up

I don't believe in human nature
Man is totally imperfect
Thanks to you God
To have created such a cruel being!!!
Poor believers!!!
It's undeniable, man is a betrayer
It's logic and only in human nature
To be so selfish
To appropriate inaccessible things
Without taking care at any moment
About the repercussion of one's acts

Man shows an incomparable egoism
An imeasurable perversity
A capacity to manipulate without weakness
All of his misdeeds are pushing him
To envenom more and more
And to sink to the point of no return
We say that nature is cruel
But it's nothing compared to man
We think we evolve over the years but it's false
It is just an illusion

Humanly we regress leading
Our nation to its own decline
Man will be responsible for his own loss
Why would God have created in his person
The most perfect evil that has ever been
I'm like this and you too
We have been created in this way
Often more capable of the worse than the best
We always destroy to rebuild
Unfortunately conscious of our mistakes
Life is just an eternal renewal...

For centuries I have been looking at my kingdom
Even if it is not mine yet, I'm his almighty creator
For a long time in the darkness of the wings
I have missed nothing of the show
And soon I will be here for the end
The fall of your holy father

And if today I'm at the height of my reign
The future successor of the throne: it's thanks to you
You, ignorant of the repercussions of your doings
Your fanatism has taken you to the point of no return
It has pushed you to join my legions
It's in your nature to follow the lord's flock!!!
In creating your god you have unconsciously
Got me its opposite, out of the emptiness
It's fundamental!!! All human beings have their opposite

With pride and honor I aspire a new era
The one of chaos and decadence
The one of vengeance and heresy
The one of inquisition towards Christianity
And all other forms of beliefs

I will be idolized, even better
Detested, cursed, execrated
But above all respected and feared
Because no one is able to commit such infamies
Time has come for me to emerge from darkness
And to reveal my real face
My reign of terror will be legendary!!!!